Overheard in the oval office:

So this is it.

Guess so.

I just wanted to say, y’know…

I know.  It’s okay, you don’t have to say it.

This is hard.

Yeah.

Write me?

Sure.  Every day, boss.

Cool.

I… I should prob’ly get goin’.

Yeah.  Long drive.

Long drive.  Texas.

Yeah.  Texas.  You, uh…  You got everything?

Yeah.

Need gas money?

I’m good.

Okay then.  Pinky shake?

Okay…pinky shake.

Attaboy.  Say, Karl…

Yes, Mr. President?

You think we’ll ever get the chance to fuck over this many people again?

I doubt it.  But it was fun while it lasted.

Goddam right.

Savor these last sixteen months, sir.  Tempus fugit.

Yeah.  Tempered widget indeed.

Bug eyed steampunk glasses?

Check.

Smoke machine strapped to back?

Check.

Tiny guitar?

Check.

Hilly Kristal, founder of legendary NYC punk nightclub CBGB died yesterday. He was 75 years old.

Although he may not have looked it, he was the original punk rocker. He was a lover of music and would give anyone a chance to play at CBGB’s whether he liked your music or not.

From its opening in late 1973, when Mr. Kristal, a lover of acoustic music, gave the club its name, an abbreviation of the kinds of music he originally intended to feature there — country, bluegrass and blues — until a dispute with its landlord forced the club to close last October, CBGB presented thousands of bands within its eternally crumbling, flyer-encrusted walls…

“There was no real venue in 1973 for people like us,” (Patti) Smith said today. “We didn’t fit into the cabarets or the folk clubs. Hilly wanted the people that nobody else wanted. He wanted us.” – NYT

The list of my musical heroes keeps getting smaller every year. Hilly was directly responsible for putting several of them on that list. His sincerity and altruism is sorely missed in an age of Autotune, cut & paste vocal tracks and music carreers more interested in bling-age than sing-age. (wow, that was bad).

I’m sure Joey Ramone was the first to welcome you in heaven and show you where the keg was stashed. Oh and I’m sure the bathrooms are alot cleaner too.

So I got tickets to see Van Halen October 20th at Joe Louis. I saw them on the 1984 tour with David Lee Roth and then again on the first Van Hager tour. Both at Joe Louis. Should be an interesting show, even if original bassist Michael Anthony isn’t with them, which for my money was 1/2 of the VH sound. Not sure who’s gonna do those BG vocals.

As DLR said, “Meet us in the future, not the pasture”

Rockers with Walkers Tour 2007?

Oh and BTW, I have those same boots that DLR is wearing. Really. I’m wearing them right now. Seriously.

So I just bought a bunch of these stickers from Moo.com with the ChonksWorld URL on them. I am placing them around town in various spots. IF YOU HAVE SEEN ONE OF THESE please leave me a comment telling me when and where you saw it. I will take the names of all the people and draw one to receive a $20 iTunes gift certificate.

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic vexed by halitosis.

1. Don’t be gay.

2. Be “true”.

3. All people who aren’t “true” are gay.

4. Be grim.

5. Be necro.

6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.

7. Break things while being grim and necro.

8. Don’t have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed.

9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form.

10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances…
Click Here For More »

I stand corrected. This is a fake quote.
See snopes entry and thanks to LGR for pointing this out.

Direct quote from the just published REAGAN DIARIES.

The entry is dated May 17, 1986.

‘A moment I’ve been dreading. George brought his ne’re-do-well son around this morning and asked me to find the kid a job. Not the political one who lives in Florida. The one who hangs around here all the time looking shiftless. This so-called kid is already almost 40 and has never had a real job. Maybe I’ll call Kinsley over at The New Republic and see if they’ll hire him as a contributing editor or something. That looks like easy work.’

Ok, so I stumbled across this new style of “Squatting”, and the more I read and watched, it really started to creep me out.

Phrogging is the act of sneaking into a house and living among its occupants without their knowledge. People who attempt this are referred to as phrogs. Phrogs try to respect the house’s inhabitants as if they were roommates, by not breaking or taking-although mooching food is sometimes necessary for survival. Phrogs rarely stay in a single house for more than a few days as the fear of getting caught settles in. Then it’s usually time to move on and the phrog will hop to a new pad. Phrogging can be attempted solo or in groups.

They even have their own gear, and even ringtones – Geesh!

So then I found a site that a documentary film producer gave a camera to 2 phroggers to document their escapade hiding in a huse. The entire 5 days of tape are now online and makes for an extremely intriguing-creepy watch. The project is called Living With Strangers and be forwarned that once you start watching you won’t be able to stop.

In the summer of 2006, two girls videotaped the five days they spent secretly living in someone’s house.

This is not the first time they have lived in a house without the homeowner’s knowledge. It’s all part of their unusual lifestyle known as “phrogging”.

Loren and Renee are part of an emerging underground subculture that is virtually unknown. These individuals who refer to themselves as “phrogs”, have discovered an alternative to the 9-5 routine of the working class.

Brilliant!

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Unlike other toys, our manufacturer is so sure of its durability they guarantee it against the most playful dog destruction. It Bends. It Bounces. It Flies. It Floats. And best of all, it lasts through the whole season and more!

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Representative Bob Allen, a Republican in the Florida House of Representatives, blamed the weather and his fear of black men for offering $20 to perform oral sex on a man in a public park. The man turned out to be an undercover police officer, who promptly arrested Allen.

Titusville Officer Danny Kavanaugh who was on plainclothes duty says he observed Allen entering the washroom twice. Kavanaugh said he was drying his hands in a stall when Allen peered over the stall door.

The officer’s report said that after peering over the stall a second time, Allen pushed open the door and joined Kavanaugh inside. Allen muttered “‘hi,’v” and then said, “‘this is kind of a public place, isn’t it,’” the report said.

Kavanaugh wrote that he asked Allen about going somewhere else and Allen suggested going “across the bridge, it’s quieter over there.”

“Well look, man, I’m trying to make some money; you think you can hook me up with 20 bucks?” Kavanaugh wrote in the report that he had asked Allen.

The Republican lawmaker, the report said, replied, “Sure, I can do that, but this place is too public.”

According to Kavanaugh’s statement, the officer said, “do you want just (oral sex)?” and Allen replied, “I was thinking you would want one.”

It was at that point Allen was arrested.

When Allen was loaded into the patrol car, the statement said, he asked if “it would help” that he was a state legislator.

“No,” the officer said.

Soon after taking office in 2001, Allen was one of 21 Florida legislators to sign Gov. Jeb Bush’s friend-of-the-court brief supporting the state’s ban on gays adopting children.

In March, he co-sponsored an unsuccessful bill that would have enhanced penalties for “offenses involving unnatural and lascivious acts” such as indecent exposure.

The Florida Times Union reports: “In his seven years in the Legislature Rep. Bob Allen of Merritt Island has built up a 92 percent approval rating with the Christian Coalition of Florida on issues like abortion, marriage and pornography.”